This example of a college admissions person essay written for the Common Application was targeted for question #5 on the pre-2013 on diversity. But Carrie writes about the central part of her identity, so would be a good match: "Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it.
When I sat down to write this essay, I tried, as my high school English teacher always instructed, to imagine the audience for my writing. The more I thought about it, the more I pitied the college admissions screeners who would be reading a thousand essays on diversity. Along with the expected takes on race and ethnicity, how many of those essays would present their authors as outcasts, loners, kids who didn’t fit in at his or her school? How could I present myself as someone unique and interesting—strange, even—without falling prey to the cliché of the self-pitying social misfit?
N2 - In the first systematic study of what college applicants invoke when required to submit a diversity essay, we revisit many settled assumptions on both the left and the right about how such an essay would operate after Grutter and Gratz as well as after the passage of anti-affirmative action ballot initiatives. Our data are a sample of 176 diversity essays submitted to the University of Michigan in the immediate aftermath of the University's Supreme Court win, analyzed both qualitatively and quantitatively with special attention to the differences that the essay writer's race and class position make. We find that in many respects the essays are similar when written by applicants from similar backgrounds but different races, and that conservative critics were wrong to assume the essay would function simply as a way of announcing oneself as an under-the-table affirmative action candidate. Rather than suggesting a straightforward lineup of advantage and disadvantage, we suggest rather that the essay is a vehicle for the youngest generation of citizens to both receive and send back a new conception of difference that has some essentializing elements but overall is turning in a postracial, cosmopolitan direction.
Carrie takes a risk in her essay. When you read advice about , you'll often be told to somewhat conservatively, get rid of the pink hair and remove all but the most innocuous piercings. The danger of looking too far out of the norm is that you may encounter an admissions officer who isn't open-minded or who feels disturbed or uncomfortable with your appearance.
Yet, despite the country’s diverse population, the workplace remains a place of inequality as women and minorities continue to earn less than their white male counterparts (U.S.
The topic was "Resolved: Race-based affirmative action in college and university admissions should be eliminated." Bard argued in favor of the topic and Morehouse argued against.
The quality of the writing in this essay is superb, and it is even more impressive because Carrie is going into the sciences, not the humanities where we might expect to see stronger writing. The essay has no grammatical errors, and some of the reveal a high level of rhetorical sophistication. If you take apart the essay sentence by sentence, you'll notice a huge variety in sentence length and structure. The admissions officers will immediately recognize Carrie as someone who has a mastery of language and is prepared for college-level writing.
In fact, Voutsas (2011) argues that the U.S workforce is the most demographically heterogeneous workforce in the world and he believes that this is due to major changes and diversity .Borkowski (2012) also states that the significant changes in the US populations has been seen greatly in regards to gender, age ,and race and ethnicity ....
"MSAC reaches more and more prospective students every year. I’m happy to play a part in promoting diversity of all kinds on campus." — Alex H., MSAC Chair
The team, composed of students enrolled in the Bard Prison Initiative, debated Morehouse, one of the best debate programs in the country and the first historically black college team to debate at Eastern.
In a global marketplace diversity is theorised as a corporation that employs a diverse workforce in that includes both genders, people of many generations and those from ethnically and racially diverse backgrounds....
The current Common Application essay option #1 is a smart choice for Carrie's topic, for the essay certainly is about a central part of her identity. Carrie clearly shows how she will add an interesting and desirable element to the campus community. The essay demonstrates that she has thought about identity and diversity, that she is open-minded, and that she has a thing or two to teach others about their preconceptions and biases. She weaves in enough details about her passions and accomplishments to debunk any knee-jerk assumptions a reader might make about a Goth.
Carrie, however, isn't one to tone down her identity during the admissions process. Her essay blatantly states "this is who I am," and she makes it the job of the reader to overcome his or her preconceptions. There is a slight danger that she will get a reader who refuses to accept the "Goth" culture Carrie describes, but most readers will love the way Carrie approaches her topic as well as her straight-shooting style. The essay has a level of maturity and self-confidence that the reader will find attractive. Also, the reader is likely to be impressed by the way that Carrie imagines her audience's reaction. She has clearly encountered prejudice before, and she preempts it when she imagines the admissions folks reading her essay.
It is all too easy to fall into traditional modes of self-presentation when applying to colleges. But since Deep Springs is unusual, it is hard to tell from “usual” essays how well a student might fare here. This means our essay questions should bring you to a stop for an hour or two.